Nothing urgent is out there calling you to get out of bed. Is there? The perk of being a senior.
So, in the morning, I look forward to having my cup of coffee. I have had my coffee in bed these days, and I realized how enjoyable it is. I used to get up, get ready for work and drive to the office, waiting to get a coffee there. It perks me up for work.
However, now that there is no work to hurry to, I can enjoy my cup of coffee leisurely, every sip a delight.
It makes me feel I have nothing else to do, only enjoy being with myself, essential.
I had no idea of its joyous potential until recently, when the lockdown made me live with myself and no one else. I talk to myself. I only see myself, so I began to see myself consciously. I started to know it, explore its inner realities, and what a surprise it is.
The self has a tremendous inner world waiting to be known. I started exploring, and I delved into its dark side. I felt its fears, insecurities, deficiencies, sorrows, anxieties, and secrets. It astounded me that I connected to it, got to know it, and brought it to light.
As I dug deeper, I found my inner self beneath these, a self full of light, beauty, and capable of creating. I started connecting to this self, and my life changed. Could this be real?
My life fills with magic as I welcome the new unfolding, the unknown getting known each day. A different pattern unfolds before me, something I create not with the usual effort of the previous self but with the ease of connecting to power beyond oneself.
Now, I love these moments of being with myself and connecting its power to its depth to its unending capacity. I realize I am not seeking my mission in life which for years I agonize over. I strive for myself, the self that is my gift to the world. It’s myself as it continues in its creative unfolding. Here I am, universe. I am the gift, the mission, the calling. I am as I become and connect to the universe.
I had for years felt the longing for home, not the physical house, and for years I moved from country to country, and it kept nagging at me. I did not understand it, so I ignored it, but it stayed on.
Recently, I have come home with time for myself and alone with myself. To a world right there inside of me and yet connected to all. I have come home.
I now realize I have one call, one mission, to be. To be the fully developed being that I am. As I do this, I become more connected to the world because as I become one with myself, I become one with the world. Oneness. No more division. Wholeness.
So one more coffee in bed. One more time to be me.