An old nun I dearly love once leaned in close and whispered a single word into my ear just as I was standing on the edge of one of the biggest decisions of my life: Courage.
At the time, her words wrapped around me like a warm blanket, comforting, but not quite taken seriously. For years, I tucked that word away like a keepsake—something to take out and admire occasionally but never really use. Only recently have I realized just how powerful that one whispered word was. It wasn’t just advice; it was a key. A key to unlock a door I’d been too scared to even knock on. My only regret is that I didn’t take it to heart sooner.
Looking back, I see that fear was the invisible thread that ran through every choice I made. Fear of failing, fear of being judged, fear of messing up spectacularly—or even just a little bit. It was all too easy to let fear call the shots. But last night, I watched The Wrecked Life… it felt more like my life story, honestly), and like Agathe, I realized I’d spent too much of my time holding back, waiting, bracing for disaster. And as a result, I never really lived.
These days, though, I’ve decided enough is enough. I’m not letting fear have the remote control of my life anymore. And surprise, surprise—life is actually a lot more fun this way! I’ve stopped going out with friends out of obligation, and now I go because I genuinely enjoy it. Even the simple things, like cleaning the house, have become… well, I won’t say thrilling, but at least mildly amusing. (Seriously, who knew that mopping the floor to a dance playlist could be so satisfying?) Just watch my 75 year old friends do it!
I’m even getting used to this strange, relaxed version of myself. For years, I carried tension in every muscle, like I was preparing for an earthquake that never came. Now, it feels like I’ve traded that twisted, stressed-out body for something far more comfortable—and I’m learning to settle into it, like breaking in a new pair of shoes.
And driving! Once upon a time, the thought of heavy traffic gave me cold sweats and sleepless nights. But now? I see traffic jams as a chance to practice patience (and to catch up on my favorite podcasts). It’s no longer something to dread—it’s just another part of the adventure.
So here’s to courage. To finally letting go of fear. To stepping fully into life, even if it means dancing with a mop or singing in traffic.
Much of the world is aging. This demographic trend presents a challenge not only to policymakers but also to most of us as we deal with our aging, that of our immediate families, and those of our extended circles.
65th Birthday Party. Source: aesta1
Over the next 20 years, Canada’s senior population will grow by 68%. The 75 plus will double. The same is true in other countries.
Indeed, this is becoming a significant concern as many aging adults are also getting sick and demand care beyond what they can do for themselves. This care often falls on immediate family members who also provide and care for their families. No one is exempt from the impact of this growing trend.
I see our growing concern when I socialize with my friends in our seventies. Some are still active and able to care for their grandchildren, although they admit it is becoming more of a challenge. Others already need care as they have difficulty walking alone or remembering things.
Many of us live on our own and will have to depend on our extended families for care. Some are lucky to have caring nieces or nephews, but most complain that weeks can pass without their extended family members asking how they are. This gripe is often understandable as extended family members work stressful jobs and care for their children and, sometimes, grandchildren.
Our regular togetherness makes us escape isolation. It gives us companionship, so we try to do it often. Still, the issue of an aging population continues to niggle at us. Some of us feel the what-ifs. What if something happens to them and their mobility is affected? Will they continue to live on their own or be with family members? What if they pass out and no one is around? Will they be dead by the time people find them? What will happen to their dogs and cats who depend on them? These are real concerns for those who are aging.
Of course, this also impacts the immediate family members. What are they going to do? Will they put their loved ones in a home? Homes for older people are getting scarce and expensive, and many need help to afford to be in them. The affordable ones are not so good that you hesitate to put your family in them.
If they put them in a home, who will pay if the aged person doesn’t have enough resources? Will they be able to find one? Will it be convenient for people to visit, especially family members who no longer drive?
What about the attitudes of these Seniors? Many who have cared for themselves all these years are demanding as they expect similar assistance. They are not easy to live with and are critical.
Early on, we need to face these issues. The critical responsibility belongs to the aging person to prepare for this phase in our lives. We cannot leave the burden solely on family members. This preparation consists of:
Eat healthy. If we still need to do this, we need to start now. You can even plant vegetables or pots to inspire you to eat what you harvest. Choose to grow vegetables you enjoy eating.
Exercise. A family friend who used to vend foot blankets in the town and even adjacent ones reached over a hundred and could still walk alone. My niece, who is overweight, recently took action. She wakes up early, goes to the town plaza, and walks around until she completes ten thousand steps. It is never too late. Start whenever you can.
Take care of your finances while you are still able. Learn to save and invest your money so you have enough resources to retire. Many problems are solvable when you have the resources to do so. Don’t be stingy, especially to your possible future caregivers. A friend told me that each time she asks her nephews or nieces to help them with things they could no longer do for themselves, she rewards them. So, each time she calls, they immediately come. This is your investment, too. Another friend who does not do this, her family members, stays out of her calls. Generosity goes far. Take care of them, and they will take care of you.
Choose to live close to family members. It is difficult for them to help you when they must take a plane or drive five hours to be with you. Be realistic. It is no longer what you want but what is convenient for people to be with you unless you have all the resources to be on your own and pay for all the care you need.
Choose accommodation that’s easy to live in for an older adult. You may want to stay in your house, but your capacity may need help to take care of it. Ensure you are close to grocery stores, hospitals, your doctor, dentist, and whatever you need most. My friend had her house renovated for easy access when on wheelchairs and when needing care. A room for a caregiver will be helpful.
Know more about available care in your community. This care includes those provided by the government and private providers and may cover home visits, transport assistance, and actual care.
Please familiarize yourself with Senior homes and what they provide. Know the costs of each service. Read reviews to make the right decision when you need to move there.
Prepare your mind for aging, especially for needing care. At specific points in our lives, we will need maintenance.
Make your will and power of attorney for your health with all the instructions you want done.
Choose your funeral and pay for it so it will not be a hassle for those left behind.
Meanwhile, enjoy your life and lobby for better care for Seniors. It is good to get yourself ready so that it may still be painful when the moment comes, but the transition will be smoother.
Recently, I went to help out a friend who had a double mastectomy. I had to fly out of Canada to the U.S. I realized that getting help from people around us at our age is difficult. Most of our friends also have health issues, If not them, their spouses. A number no longer drives.
At her age of 77, it is difficult to find friends and family who could be with her as most are no longer able, even if they want to help. I saw how much social isolation is a startling reality among many Seniors.
Social Isolation in Seniors. Copyright: aesta1
I also clearly saw why social isolation is a serious concern among seniors. I saw in my friends’ circle the reasons why they live an isolated existence:
Lack of Mobility. A number no longer drives and can’t move around quickly.
Losing a spouse, family, and friends can lead to isolation. Much of the news we get every morning is about someone in our circle passing on or having health problems.
Retirement. When we retire, we lose not only our contacts but also our sense of purpose and identity. I asked a friend why she continues working when there’s no need for it. She replied that work gives her a reason to get up and dress up. Otherwise, many retirees stay in their pyjamas most of the day.
Health problems. Some of us may have mini-strokes, cancer, or other illnesses and, thus, avoid many social interactions.
Lack of access to transportation. As we age, our confidence diminishes, so we hesitate to drive. Some of us got used to having our spouses drive us, and when they pass on or become unable to do so, we find it difficult to attend social events.
Negativism. In several cultures, families are protective of seniors. They are discouraged from going out on their own. They need a companion each time they go out, which limits their attendance to social activities or even just visiting their friends or doing things they enjoy.
Negative consequences often follow as more isolation occurs in a Senior’s life. These include:
Depression and Anxiety. In the absence of social interaction, Seniors tend to focus on themselves, and issues around health make them feel sad and concerned. Social activities tend to help them forget whatever discomfort they feel.
Loneliness. Seniors who live alone often feel lonely. There are only enough soap operas to keep them entertained.
Cognitive Decline. The lack of interaction limits the use of our mental faculties. Our forgetfulness becomes more intense, and our capacity to do things erodes. Some of my friends have driving issues and need more reminders of familiar routes. Even playing games is less helpful. Interacting with friends engages and stimulates our mental faculties.
Increased risks of health problems. Being alone and lonely leads to heart issues and mental breakdown.
We must take this issue of social isolation among seniors seriously. There are things we can do to address this issue of social interaction:
Sharing Accommodation. In some societies, Seniors live with their families. Our friends discussed it with their kids and divided the year between two families. In many Asian cultures, unmarried or widowed aunts and uncles live with families. Their presence is a big help in the kids’ development process. They often help cook or be present when the kids come home from school.
Providing transportation. Friends and family can do this to enable Seniors in their families to attend social events.
Becoming part of a group. Seniors can join a club, take a class in a community or senior center near them, or volunteer for important causes.
Introducing them to active Seniors defying age-old prejudices so they have models of what is possible.
Living in age-friendly communities. If not, create one. You can do much to engage your neighbourhood in becoming friendly and supportive of Seniors.
Hiring caregivers who can be with them and provide them with the company and support necessary. Someone who can drive and have a license is a big help.
With a bit of concern, this problem need not be serious. Individuals and communities can help make Seniors in our neighbourhood less socially isolated and more engaged. It is a concern that we can all address.
Life’s too short not to laugh, especially as the years roll on. Let’s journey through the comical quirks, playful stereotypes, and witty one-liners accompanying our golden years. Let’s revel in the shared laughter that unites generations and showcases the joy of growing older with a smile. Let’s take a chuckle-filled ride through the world of age-related humour – where wrinkles and wisecracks go hand in hand!”
Senior Tomfoolery. Copyright: aesta1
Some Senior Tomfoolery will do us good today. I love this term tomfoolery. It is whimsical and playful. It brings to mind the lighthearted antics and mischievous moments seniors often experience. It embraces the idea that laughter, fun, and a sense of humour are essential ingredients for a fulfilling and joyful life in our golden years.
Whether it’s the occasional forgetfulness, quirky adventures, or witty banter, “senior tomfoolery” celebrates the playful side of aging and the ability to find humour in everyday situations. It’s a reminder that age is just a number, and life can remain full of laughter and whimsy regardless of the calendar year.
I’ll start with these two stories, which you have your versions of. Indeed, here are a couple of funny stories related to age-related humour that you can consider adding to your article:
Story 1: The Accidental Selfie An older acquaintance, new to the world of smartphones, decided to take a selfie for the first time. She held the phone at arm’s length, smiled at the camera, and snapped the picture. Little did she know, she had the camera set to the front-facing mode. When she saw the photo, she exclaimed, “Who’s that old lady in my phone?” Her family had a good laugh, explaining that the “old lady” was her reflection.
Story 2: The Senior Yoga Class A group of seniors decided to try a yoga class at their local community center. As they attempted various poses, the instructor noticed one participant struggling with a basic stretch. She asked if everything was alright, to which the senior replied, “I’m fine, dear, but it seems my body didn’t get the ‘flexible in old age’ memo. It’s stuck in ‘pretzel mode.'”
Story 3: The Instagram Moment A friend celebrating her birthday told us last night at dinner about her Instagram moment. Some at our dinner table saw it, but some didn’t. She even needed to remember where she uploaded it. Was it on Facebook or Instagram? Some of us claimed we did not see it on Facebook, so it must be on Instagram. Anyway, she did a video of herself singing to send to her son, who was away, and this was her first time doing it. Without knowing it, instead of just sending it to her son, she pushed the button longer, and it sent the video to everyone. It started a flurry of comments, which made her realize what she did.
Aside from these stories, we all had our fair share of humorous moments. Have you had any of these? 1. Forgetful Fun: Seniors might playfully blame their “senior moments” when they forget where they put their glasses or keys. Once, I searched the whole house of my glasses, and it wasn’t anywhere. My grandson arrived, and I told him about it. He looked at me and said, You’re wearing them. I looked for my keys once, only to be told that I had them in my hands. You can say, “I used to have a memory, but I forgot where I put it.” 2. Prankster Grandparents: Some grandparents enjoy playing gentle pranks on their grandchildren, like pretending to lose a tooth or pulling coins from their ears. 3. Tech Troubles: Seniors navigating modern technology can create humorous situations, from accidentally taking selfies to sending amusing voice messages. “I asked my grandkid to help me with my smartphone, and now it takes selfies when I sneeze.” 4. Tongue-in-Cheek Wisdom: Seniors often share witty life advice or observations from years of experience, delivering humorous wisdom. A friend called me the other day and said she missed her Mom, who usually came out with these witty comments. She cited this: “I’ve got a new job as a human barometer; my joints predict rain better than the Weather Channel.” 5. Double Entendre: Seniors can craft humour from innocent phrases with a playful double meaning, leaving others in stitches. 6. Senior Gags: Participating in age-related humour, like sharing jokes about aging, wrinkles, or memory loss. “I’m not old; I’m just chronologically gifted.” Or, “I’ve got so many wrinkles; my face is a roadmap of my life.” 7. Unexpected Hobbies: Picking up surprising hobbies like skydiving or rock climbing can amuse friends and family. I met an 80-year-old Japanese lady who went scuba diving. The instructor was with her all the time, but she did not have any issues at all. She planned to climb Mt. Everest after that. 8. Dancing Queens and Kings: Seniors hitting the dance floor, showing off their dance moves, often to the delight of those around them. I remembered an old nun showing us her tango moves during recreation. She was so good at it that we all burst out in laughter. 9. Mischievous Puns: Using puns and wordplay to create laughter and delight in everyday conversations. “I’ve got so many pills to take that I need a pill to remember to take my pills!” 10. Storytelling: Sharing humorous anecdotes from their past can be entertaining and enlightening. “It feels like I was 30 just yesterday, and now I’m the star of my own ‘Golden Girls’ episode.”
These moments remind us that humour and a playful spirit can be lifelong companions, regardless of age. What can we do but laugh? Why worry when we can’t hear each other? Laugh at it.
Dreamers, where are you? Buried in security, stability, and safety. Wallowing in wealth maybe, but tired and weary. Yes, millions of Seniors today have given up on their dreams. They go through life doing the same dreary thing day after day. They know it is dismal, but they stick to it. It is familiar, and there is comfort in the expected. Are you one of these?
Dreams. Copyright: aesta1
Once in a while, a desire comes, but rationalizations often cloud such desire. The “what ifs” are so firmly ingrained that somehow, whatever desire comes up immediately is squashed or placed aside on the back burner.
As early as childhood, our social environment has made us think of security and safety before allowing our desires to get the better of us. Wishes passion are not to be trusted. And we pass on the same to our children as we repeat the often-remembered scripts our parents or grandparents used to say.
How do we get out of this conditioning and allow our dreams to once more drag us from our safe and secure corners and explore what is unknown and unfamiliar? Here are some suggestions that may work for you:
Listen to the inner voice in you. Our life is cluttered and filled with so much noise that we hear our inner desires and longings, the big things we thought about in our younger years when our social environment had not yet affected us much. We thought we could be Superman, Luke Vader, or Sky Walker.
Try out new things. You never know some things may interest you if you never try them. Usually, we do something we are used to and know of. But find out about other activities and events and see how you can participate and get engaged. You can be part of so many circles in your life right now that you may be unaware of or have just dismissed all these years. Give it a try.
Meet new people. This experience is essential for those of you who may have just lived in close circles of family and friends. Try to hang around people who are entirely different from you, and chances are they will bring you to activities you never even thought about or have always dreaded doing.
Educate yourself. New opportunities appear when you learn about other things you don’t know about. Some of those may not have crossed your mind because you had no information about them.
Be aware. Watch your day-to-day activities, which get much more attention and give you more life. Notice what truly matters to you.
Talk about some of the things that catch your attention and engagement. Learn more about it from people, books, and experiences of others. As you get more engaged, watch your reaction, and they give you feedback. If you feel the passion in you building up for whatever you get engaged in, go for it.
Countless experiences and research have validated that people who pursue their dreams are much more successful in their work and, most significantly, in their personal lives. It’s time to let that dream come true.
Tokyo, the vibrant capital city of Japan, offers a captivating blend of modernity and tradition. While it is often associated with its bustling streets, advanced technology, and youthful energy, Tokyo has much to offer senior visitors.
Tokyo.Copyright:aesta1
But before embarking on your Tokyo adventure, research attractions and activities that cater to your interests and physical capabilities. Make a list of must-visit destinations and create an itinerary accordingly.
Look for hotels or guesthouses that provide accessibility features such as ramps, elevators, and rooms designed with senior comfort in mind. Because we visited immediately after the Covid lockdown, hotels went out of their way to make our stay very comfortable. Although with the Japanese predilection for perfection, you will surely get the best treatment in any hotel.
Many hotels also offer concierge services to assist with transportation and tour bookings. I suggest you take a guided tour of the city on your first day. It is not expensive to book a tour in your language; doing this on your first day gives you an idea of where you want to spend time during your visit.
Copyright:aesta1
Some of Tokyo’s attractions that are worth visiting are:
– Tokyo’s Cultural Gems like Peaceful Gardens, where you can take a stroll through exquisite gardens like Shinjuku Gyoen, Rikugien, or Hama-rikyu. These serene oases offer tranquillity amid the bustling city, perfect for unwinding and appreciating nature’s beau- Historic Temples and Shrines like Senso-ji in Asakusa or Meiji Shrine in Shibuya, where you can experience the spiritual atmosphere, admire the stunning architecture and even partake in traditional rituals like washing hands and offering prayers.
– Tokyo’s Neighborhoods, such as Asakusa, where you can glimpse old Tokyo with its narrow streets, market stalls, and historic temples. Also, explore Nakamise Shopping Street, known for its traditional snacks and souvenirs. Go to Ueno, which houses several museums, including the Tokyo National Museum. In the Spring, you can relax under the cherry blossom trees.
For upscale shoppers, head to Ginza, famous for its luxury boutiques, department stores, and gourmet restaurants. Enjoy window shopping, savour a cup of tea at a traditional tea house, or catch a performance at the Kabuki-za theatre.
– Tokyo Skytree. Ascend the world’s tallest tower for breathtaking panoramic views of the city. The observation decks are easily accessible via elevators with facilities for wheelchair users.
– Odaiba: This futuristic island showcases architectural wonders, shopping malls, and entertainment venues. The Rainbow Bridge connects it to the mainland, and there are accessible waterfront promenades for pleasant walks.
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For relaxation and wellness, explore these places:
– Hot springs: Experience the therapeutic benefits of Japanese hot springs, or “onsen.” Odaiba Ooedo-Onsen Monogatari and Spa LaQua are popular options that offer a variety of bathing facilities, relaxation areas, and rejuvenating treatments.
-Traditional tea houses: Indulge in the tranquillity of a traditional tea ceremony. Many tea houses provide tatami mat seating and are accommodating to seniors.
For ease in moving around the city, choose accommodations near Tokyo’s subway stations with elevator access, and always ask your hotel for the closest station to your intended destinations. Taxis are widely available. Look for taxis with “Universal Design,” as these are accessible for individuals with mobility needs.
Our Japanese friend assured us that most Japanese understand and can speak English but are hesitant. However, if asked for help, they are always willing to be of service.
During our visit, we used the subway and train system in Tokyo and from Tokyo to other cities in Japan, and we found it very easy to navigate. It’s very comfortable and always on time. The stations also have stores and restaurants catering to varied food preferences.
For ease in moving around the city, choose accommodations near Tokyo’s subway stations with elevator access, and always ask your hotel for the closest station to your intended destinations. Taxis are widely available. Look for taxis with “Universal Design,” as these are accessible for individuals with mobility needs. Our Japanese friend assured us that most Japanese understand and can speak English but are hesitant. However, if asked for help, they are always willing to be of service.During our visit, we used the subway and train system in Tokyo and from Tokyo to other cities in Japan, and we found it very easy to navigate. It’s very comfortable and always on time. The stations also have stores and restaurants catering to varied food preferences.
Copyright:aesta1
Contrary to our expectation that Tokyo is an expensive place, we found that we could find prepared meals at Family Mart, Lawson, and other convenience shops that were tasty and inexpensive. Once in a while you could splurge and enjoy a Japanese meal in one of Tokyo’s famous restaurants.
You will enjoy experiencing Tokyo’s unique flavour and culture. The city welcomes Seniors and makes it easy for them to move around. We enjoyed our visit so much that some of us are returning this year.
Now that I am way back into my senior year, I have had a taste of what to do. Some things I did were fantastic, and some were failures. Some were memorable, and some I just erased from my memory. So much garbage, I have to tell you. But if we don’t try, we’ll end up sitting or lying on our couches and being entertained by K-dramas or other soap operas.
After hours of this, I often ask myself, what have I done?
So, today, my mind wandered into some things seniors like me can do, and my thoughts, assisted by online research and whine from my other senior friends, came up with these.
Some may think these all require resources you may not have. You’re in for a surprise at how much of these you can enjoy for less money or free once you put your mind to it. I almost forgot where I was. Here they are:
Take care of your body.
Exercise, eat healthily, hydrate, and see your doctor regularly. The dollar signs are showing in your mind $for Pilates Courses, Yoga, Acupuncture, Massage, or Chiropractors. Yes, these cost money, but some can be paid for by your insurance, especially if you have your doctor’s referral. Many of these exercises will not cost you money.
For a week, I had been looking at a card from a chiropractor who promised that he could change your posture as it affects your health. I planned to give the clinic a visit. But as I lay on my couch browsing what I could watch, I considered what YouTube could offer. I was surprised at how many chiropractors provide tips on how to work on your posture. I focused only on those I could do in my lazy state of no exercise. I did the exercise not regularly but only on times when I remembered and wherever I could do it. After about two weeks of doing these, I was surprised at my change, so I was encouraged to do it more and look for other exercises I could do.
It is not simply the exercises but also the food we ingest. Shall we talk about these? Once, I baked a cake, and since I was alone, I ate it all. And I’m not even an expert baker. Sweets, baked goods, and so many favourites tempt us as we’re at home, and the fridge and the pantry are only steps away. Now, I buy fresh and dried berries and place bowls in front of my couch, so I often reach out for them and forget to search for other snacks.
Hydrate. Often, we need to remember to drink water. A whole morning can pass without me drinking water. Of course, dehydration leads to other problems like dry skin leading to eczema, or even more severe than this. To remember, I place two glasses of water in front of my couch, and once I finish one glass, I replenish it, so each time I look at these glasses, I drink.
Sometimes, I laugh when I think of doctors’ and dentists’ visits as the starred activities in my calendar. Such appointments competed with meetings and conferences in the past. Now, they are the highlights of our week. Well, go for it.
Improve your mental health.
Losing our memory is often a concern at this stage, but that is only the tip of the iceberg. When I talk with my friends, loneliness comes up. Several seniors complain they need someone to talk to, as many live independently. I have Alexa to harass, and each time I tell her something to do, I have a smile on my face.
You have to be more creative in finding ways to socialize. We are lucky now that we are connected. You can talk to friends and other family members online if those close to you cannot see you. Pursue a hobby and join clubs around this. Read books and enjoy the ups and downs of the characters. You can learn from them how to handle life’s challenges.
Make sure you get enough sleep. Try to spend time with nature and with funny people. Watch comedians you like and laugh. There’s nothing like laughter to make your day.
Treat yourself to something you love. You have overworked yourself in the past. Now is the time to be kind to yourself. Go and have an affogato. Watch your favourite actor or actress. Buy yourself something nice. Go to a spa.
Feed your Spirit
Expand your consciousness each day. Travel and explore new places. Meet new people. Engage in new activities. Try new food. Let its flavours wake up your taste. Go beyond what you’ve always done. Try meditation. Join classes and get transported to a world beyond your senses.
Over and beyond these, be yourself. Do what feels good to you, what brings you joy and fulfillment. You are unique. Don’t be a copycat. Appreciate what your friends do and what is happening to them, but know you. Only You knows what will be good for You. Your Senior Years are your biggest bonus. You can do whatever you want now—no boss to break you in, no child to care for, and no more fears about looks. So, go and make your senior years your best.
The other day as I was walking back from my trip to the pharmacy, I saw a man take his shirt off and hit the pole with it several times until he got exhausted, shouting simultaneously. The words were incoherent, but the anger was palpable. It was a sunny morning and many people were walking so I was not afraid. I was a bit concerned.
Suppressed Anger. Copyright: aesta1
I went on with my walk home and drove to the cottage. My thoughts returned to that man’s anger in the lake’s quiet. Slowly, I was down into my depths, and I felt the rage as well. Persons, events, and memories flooded my mind, and I understood how much anger I repressed and denied in my life. I could hit a pole, too, like that man—more than a hundred times.
Going back to my childhood, I felt anger but never got a handle on my feeling. I remembered my mother asking me why I was happy in school and with my friends, but the moment I arrived home, I got angry and vented my anger on anyone or anything.
I never thought about it then, or maybe because, at that time, I did not have the answer, so I let it slide. Looking back, my teachers and classmates had a say in my performance. My teachers rated me, and my classmates voted in classroom elections. My parents and people at home did not. So, in school and outside of the house, I pleased people. I was outstanding at pleasing people. I was a model student and topped everything, but something nagged inside me.
Maybe, because I was a second child and tried to get more attention, I hated home because my elder sister, the firstborn, was there. I resented this without anyone noticing it, or maybe they saw and recognized it as normal behaviour in a second child.
After years of this anger, I became an expert in hiding my anger from others. I hid it as my pride would never allow me to let others know that anything hurt or affected me. No way will they get such satisfaction. But the outbursts came, often at people I expected to understand me. Of course, they didn’t, as I had never expressed how I felt. Outwardly, I was an achiever, so nobody thought of the feelings I had as a second fiddle. They only saw the pride and wanted to deflate the inflated ego.
Sometimes, these outbursts would come at the most unexpected times. A word or comment could trigger it. After such strong emotions, my husband would say, Eow, where did that come from?
Now, I am seriously taking the steps to acknowledge and accept this anger.
Anger was inside me, ignored or denied for many years. I grew up in a culture where you do this. You are encouraged to keep to yourself negative emotions for harmony within the family and the more extensive group the family is part of.
Acknowledging anger started my liberation. I accept it as a valid emotion responding to what threatens or hurts me. It no longer has a hold on me. I have a handle on it.
When my 70-plus-year-old friends and I go on long trips, we always ask our funny friends to sit by us. You know why. We overlook the time when we keep laughing.
Humour brings joy, alleviates stress, and enhances our social connections. I only wish I have this sense of humour. Sadly, when the Angel of God distributed this gift, I was not around. Still, I am here to share how humour can benefit Seniors.
Here are a few:
Laughter boosts mood. Humour and laughter release endorphins, which are natural feel-good chemicals. Seniors who engage in humour and laughter experience an improved mood and increased happiness.
Stress relief. Aging can come with challenges, but humour can be a stress reliever. Finding humour in everyday situations helps seniors cope with stress, lighten their outlook, and maintain a positive mindset.
Social connection. Sharing laughter and humour strengthens social bonds and fosters connections with others. Simply sharing funny stories with friends can create a sense of camaraderie and alleviate feelings of loneliness or isolation.
Mental health. Humour stimulates the brain and promotes mental agility. It improves cognitive functioning, memory, and creativity. Activities like solving puzzles, playing games, or watching comedy shows can be mentally stimulating and entertaining.
Perspective and resilience. Humour helps seniors maintain a sense of perspective and resilience when facing challenges. It allows us to find the lighter side of life and approach difficulties with a positive attitude.
It is, however, essential to note that humour should always be respectful and sensitive to individual preferences. What may be funny to one person might not be to another. When using humour with seniors, it’s essential to consider their cultural background, values, and personal circumstances. Otherwise, it can break relationships.
Isn’t it wonderful to be fully present to someone or something? It’s a moment full of magic. Mindfulness is a powerful tool to cultivate a resounding presence, enhance well-being, and find joy in simple moments. It offers you a doorway to engaging with life fully, embracing each day with gratitude and awareness.
Ages ago, a missionary sister from Africa told us how the locals she was living with in Kenya would come to visit and stay for hours, just being there. We don’t do these visits. When nothing happens for even a few minutes, we get anxious. We can’t even wait in stores.
For Seniors, we have the time to spend with those we love, with something we enjoy or are curious about. So, this is our moment to be more mindful and look at people and events with patience and appreciation. But what is mindfulness?
1. The Essence of Mindfulness: Living in the Present Moment
The key to Mindfulness is to be present in the here and now. It is embracing each moment with curiosity and non-judgment.
I was talking with a friend who is now in her 80s, and we acknowledged that we immediately make judgments. Instantaneously, we do. We were programmed to do so.
Mindfulness cultivates a deeper appreciation for life’s simple events and for people we encounter everyday. Each person is unique and every event is full of meaning.
Mindfulness can support emotional well-being in Seniors. It offers techniques for recognizing and managing emotions, cultivating self-compassion, and fostering resilience. As we transition to being alone or be neglected, we need ways to manage our feelings and our ways of being with everyone especially with people around us.
It includes mindful breathing, body scan meditation, and loving-kindness meditation to promote emotional balance and inner harmony.
3. Enhancing Physical Health: Mindful Movement and Self-Care
Mindfulness promotes physical health and vitality for Seniors. Mindfulness encourages gentle movement practices, such as mindful walking, chair yoga, or Tai Chi, to improve balance, flexibility, and overall well-being.
4. Sharpening Cognitive Abilities: Focus and Mental Clarity
Mindfulness practices can support Seniors’ cognitive health and mental clarity. It improves focus, attention, and memory through mindfulness-based exercises Engaging in mindfulness practices stimulates mental agility and improves overall cognitive abilities.
Some Religious Sisters practice “presence de Dieu,” during which they ring the bell at specific points of the day and then recollect themselves. It makes them focus on what is essential in their lives in the midst of activities.
5. Nurturing Social Connections: Compassionate Interactions
Mindfulness enhances social interactions and fosters deeper connections through mindful communication techniques that promote active listening, empathy, and understanding.
It also includes practices for cultivating gratitude and appreciation for loved ones, fostering meaningful relationships, and contributing to a sense of community.
6. Cultivating Self-Care Rituals: Moments of Stillness and Reflection
There are some mindfulness exercises that you can incorporate into daily routines, such as morning rituals, mindful pauses throughout the day, or evening reflection practices. Start with creating a tranquil space at home for meditation, relaxation, and self-care.
Sometimes, I light a candle and send a friend or a family member loving-kindness wherever they are and whatever they do. It makes me present to the person.
Mindfulness is a profound gift that you can embrace to bring a sense of calm, clarity, and contentment to your life. For Seniors, practicing Mindfulness can cultivate emotional well-being, enhance physical health, sharpen cognitive abilities, nurture social connections, and create moments of stillness and reflection. When fully present to someone or something, magic happens. Give your senior years more magic.
